I love going to church because I feel like the issues I am going through are actually being addressed and I am given practical, but still Godly advice on how to deal with my issues.
I encourage everyone to find a church that actually focuses on the word of God and not on other things because you will get sound advice.
With that being said, this past Sunday, I learned about how we all should deal with difficult people in our lives. Now whether you are a Christian or not, I can confidently say that this is an issue we have all dealt with at some point in our lives.
Since we were children, we have listened to our parents and anyone in our immediate surroundings bombard us with numerous amounts of advice on how to deal with anything in our lives including difficult people. While some of the advice was good, not all of it was.
For example, “If Johnny Boy hits you, then you should hit him back…but HARDER. ” Haha.
A lot of what we learned as children has carried into our adult life, whether we want to admit it or not. The issue then becomes that a lot of people don’t know how to properly deal with people in a Godly and mature sense. I used to be the same way. Very angry (I am still a work in progress) and always ready to dish it back. Now when I have an issue, I have developed the practice of turning towards the word and saying…..yeah you guessed it….”What would Jesus do?” Don’t roll your eyes at me cause you know it’s the truth. Lol! I find that every problem I am dealing with has the solution (at least for me).
Romans 12:2. And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptance, and perfect, will of God.
I think a lot of Christians are guilty of being Godly up until someone crosses us the wrong way and God goes out the window. Sometimes it even gets as bad as hating that person. We all must remember that although we are not perfect, we are still children of God, even those who are difficult.As a result, we must always lead with respect and love. This is something that is still difficult (at times) for me, but I am realizing that not every situation needs a reaction.
Ask yourself the following question:
How do you feel once you have an outburst?
I know I don’t feel good at all and it actually makes me feel worse.
Now we have different types of difficult people which are the following:
- Volcano-explodes at anything or anyone
- Bubble Buster-debbie downer
- Hammer-hard on everything and everyone
- Mega Phone-talk often and try to talk you into submission
- Space Cadet-thinks there is nothing wrong with him or her
- cry baby-tries to use guilt to get his or her way, plays the victim
- garbage collector-reminds you constantly of everything you’ve done wrong
Whenever you are dealing with people like this, remember that such arguments are useless and that your greatest weapon is to not entertain such people.
2 Timothy 2:14 Of these things put them in remembrance, charging them before the Lord that they strive not about words to no profit, but to the subverting of the hearers.
Below, I have listed 6 steps to dealing with a difficult person:
1. Remember you can’t please everyone.
- It is not your job in life to conform to others or make everyone happy.
2. Avoid quicksand.
- Don’t let people suck you into their foolery.
3. Live above it.
- Difficult people lose power without your participation.
4. Never retaliate
- 1 Peter 3:9 Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing.
5. Apply Gods grace to him or ger.
- Matthew 5:44 But I say unto you, love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you.
- Tell them God bless and pray for them.
6. Give them a fresh start
- Ephesians 3:17 That Christ may dwell in your hearts by faith, that ye, being rooted and grounded in love.
At the end of the day we are all humans and are allowed to make mistakes and learn from them, so don’t hold a grudge and give a second chance. Your sanity and blessings depend on it.